The ugly side of recovery

I haven't felt like posting in the last few days since my life has been reduced to bodily movements and fluids...and my pride didn't' want to go there. I woke up this morning knowing that anybody would have to deal with these things, and I HAVE kicked cancer's ass, so I a little ugliness wouldn't hurt me at all.

When I left the hospital I had all kinds of nice accessories and bling. I still had my pretty bracelet that they gave me Monday before surgery and all kinds of tape marks on my right arm since my left arm is off limits to pricks and pokes forever. I had a Foley catheter to drain urine from my beaten up bladder and a neat drum looking thing used to suck fluid from the mastectomy sight. My fancy white thigh high compression hose and an ACE bandage wrapped around my chest giving me cleavage to what isn't there finished up the sexy assembly. These have been things I haven't been able to change since I got home. I know, yuck. I DID demand to go home in a pretty pair of PJ's that I bought a month ago that have some lace and cuteness to them. It is so hard to feel cute at all...and I'm no girly-girl...but I AM a girl.

Anyway, since I got home, I've mainly sat in the recliner since there is no other place I could lay down or lean over without pain. I've had to rely on everybody in the house to bring me anything that I consume or want to do, and it is hard since I'm so used to taking care of everyone else. I've had pains that were so terrible that I couldn't make myself move, yet moving is that best thing to make the pains go away. I've taken two boxes of Gas-X to deflate my pregnant looking belly and get rid of the terrible gas pain. My Foley cath is also leaking and I'm going to hopefully get that fixed this morning in my follow up appointments. I hope it will get to go away.

Every day I get better, and today is great. I was smart and set alarms through the night to take my pain pills. I'm finally able to get up on my own with the help of my walker, and don't necessarily need the walker to get around, but appreciate that it gives me the courage to move around more. Today I start the first round of follow-up appointments, and I'm ready to get the rest of the tubes out of my body. I will also attempt a shower since I haven't bathed since before my first surgery. I'm pretty ripe...eew! On that hot note, I'm going to sign off.